Between sets

Abstract

On June 11th, 2021, I wrote this as I stood between sets in front of a mirror at my local gym. I was about to set a new personal record on my front squat. I have always had anxiety in gyms, especially ones filled with men. Usually, I use weights that allow me to hide in the corner and avoid areas like the squat rack because people often fight over those areas. I used to never wear earbuds because I was afraid to make too much noise or was worried someone would make a comment about me and I would miss it. But that day was different. As I stared into the mirror, I saw how far I have grown, how I have recreated a space that once brought me anxiety and can now instead show me how powerful, strong, beautiful, and capable I am. I finally feel as if I am a true athlete. One that builds muscle unapologetically and owns my presence in a space that was once frightening and uncomfortable. A place where I have power, not just the men around me. I now always wear a scrunchie while working out. I dare you to watch me grow.